Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Add another project to the queue

I got invited to a baby shower yesterday. Normally, I love the idea of a new baby in the world -- it's a vote for the future, as T.'s dad often says -- but this baby is, sadly, being born under a bit of a shadow. The father (putative father?) is a good-hearted soul but one of those excessively unmotivated people. The mother is, um, well, let's just say that she is not what you dream of for your son's baby-mommy. The baby wasn't planned.

In fact, this whole thing would be a perfect scenario for a How I Really Feel card: [cover with baby rattle] Congratulations on your new baby! [Inside] Mind giving the infant a paternity test? or [cover with baby basinette] Wishing you well on the birth of your son! [inside] In his honor, I have bought fifty shares in the Trojan corporation. or [cover with baby bottle] A new baby! [inside] Now will you get your tubes tied?

Looking at the bright side, this does present a wee baby to knit for. And my heart aches for this baby, being brought into a world that is already fucked up, to one parent who doesn't particularly want a baby and another who looks at the baby as a way to prevent her boyfriend from dumping her. Babies deserve to be born into families that want them for their own sake, into a stable and loving environment.

So I've really got to knit this kid something.

This presents a bit of a dilemma, given that the shower is in a couple of weeks and I'm cutting it really close as it is for my June 30th deadlines. It's gotta be something quick -- really quick -- yet cute, and it's gotta be in Encore.

Just keep your fingers crossed I don't throw a pack of baby-blue-colored condoms into the Wishing Well.

33 comments:

ccr in MA said...

Mean? Um, yes. But funny? Oh, boy, that very much too. So ouch, but laughing.

My word verification is owfrgnok, which I think sums it up nicely, actually!

Carol said...

We have same scenario in my family with one of my brothers. The product was my niece who now has a baby of her own (I think she really wanted a doll but I digress) I never knit her anything because I perceived it as wasted. Maybe I should have and tried to break the downward spiral. Good luck with your deadlines and let me know if I can help in any way.

Carol said...

I'm so wishing this baby all the good luck that comes his/her way. Poor kid.

Rachel said...

I decided a long time ago that something was forgotten when the humane race was "designed" - a better control of who is allowed to have babies! Poor kids!
I like your card with the tubes and I think the baby blue addition to the wishing well is essential!

Samantha said...

I know you didn't ask for a suggestion - this is just an attempt to try to cheer you up - but have you seen these baby booties? I think they are some of the nicest I have seen.

http://www.saartjeknits.nl/archives/2007/05/pattern_for_boo.html

Samantha said...

Sorry about that - there should, of course, have been an "ml" at the end of that link.

Try this (sorry I am so retarded in trying to write in html).

Carrie said...

OMG! "A new baby - now will you get your tubes tied?" I snorted out my coffee! If only I could be that witty about my own SIL, because she's pretty bad, too. I understand totally about feeling bad for the kids... There are some cute baby sweaters knit on size 10 needles, and I think that's gotta be the way to go.

Carol said...

Oh, Samantha, those booties are precious!!! Thanks for the link.

SandyK said...

Here's a quickie sweater Carol, that I've always had great success with:
(links to other versions on the page too)

http://www.bevscountrycottage.com/kp3.html

Carol said...

I've had the misfortune to meet those women in the pharmacy that I work in. Many of them. I always feel bad for the kid. After all, it's not their fault their mommy knows only 1 way to get a meal-ticket. But this is exactly the reason I say that everyone should have to pass a test before they have kids!

Samina said...

Do you really want to expend more than an iota of effort on this chick? I say, wander over to Target & find something cute & cheap, & spend whatever leftover time doing something for someone who'll appreciate it.

Bridget said...

Poor baby. When you start out behind on things before you're even born, it's just not fair.

I think it's important to knit something for the baby. Not for the parents (who likely won't care anyway), but so that you'll know you did something positive. And who knows, maybe the kid will grow up to be a better type of person than either of the parents.

(I do however, think that too many people have kids for the wrong reason. I don't say it though, since I don't have kids and therefore wouldn't understand ... or so I'm told ...)

Melissa said...

I think you should save your knitting effort until the kid is 4 or 5 when (s)he can truly appreciate it. Otherwise, the gift probably won't last long enough for the baby to remember it. On the other hand, those booties are so dang cute I'm wishing I knew an expectant mother--any mother--to knit for.

Mel said...

I'm so with the Carol who said people should have to pass a test. In fact, it's pretty much unanimous among all the people I work with that a licensing test should be required to have kids or pets. I think having to deal with the general public does that.

Carol said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kathy Merrick said...

So, how many kids does this paragon have already?
If the attempt at snagging a man hasn't worked before, what makes her think it will this time?

Make something because you're a nice person. Not for her.

Carol said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
soapturtle said...

Knitty's grrr knits up rather quickly. It's just a few hours. You could whip out 2 or 3 in time for the shower and get some baby lotion and soap and be done with it. (And since it's cotton, I don't think she'll be able to kill it.)

Marilyn said...

Yes, you are a nice person. Unlike me and Merrick, who are HATERS. Heh. Your making the baby something is indicative of your intrinsic sweetness. (Don't tell anyone, but I'd make the baby something too. Poor little one, with parents like that.)

I just renewed my driver's license today. Considering that I had to hand over four pieces of identification just to get a new fancy digital NJ license, wouldn't you think that having children would at least involve taking the Minnesota Multiphasic and passing?

J9 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
turtlegirl76 said...

Oh my God. I'm laughing too hard over here to tell the jag-off that commented before me that it's your blog to write what you wish. hell if they do read I wish I could write that kinda stuff and know that my sister's read it. Save a helluva lot of unnecessary phone calls.

judy said...

my favorite baby sweater to knit is the babies and bears sweater by cottage creations. it's knit from cuff to center and grafted down the back. it looks like a bsj, but i think it's cuter, and has a little hood, too.

Nell said...

I don't really think being honest is being mean. Sometimes the truth needs to be told!

I like the baby kimono from Mason Dixon for quick and easy baby gifts.

Rabbitch said...

Yes, knit something for the baby. 'cause you're a saint (like me).

Carol said...

In case any of you are wondering, I've edited out the post and some comments. I had been having second thoughts about it, and am going to trim identifying details on the slim chance that someone who knows me may read it. Unlikely, but still.

Tina M. said...

Poor kid. I know someone who's family is JUST like that. I honestly couldn't say "congratulations" to her kid when she proudly marched up to show me she was pregnant. I honestly couldn't say "congratulations" when the baby was born. I had such an awful feeling about it all.

I don't believe you're being mean, especially when you're trying to be generic in description, but I can see where some people would take immediate offense. It's hard to walk the line between "it's my blog" and being super sweet. But this is a legitimate concern, something that's bringing you sorrow, and I think you've done all right sharing it.

Krista M said...

You remind me of Miss Cornelia in Anne's House of Dreams, from the Anne of Green Gables series. She is first met sewing a very fancy baby nightgown for a family's 8th baby. She reasoned that every baby should have something precious. After all, they didn't choose their circumstances. Of course this baby should have something handmade. If the mother ruins it, so what? There was one moment when this baby was the most important thing in the world.

Marlena said...

That last card is a winner!

I've made the following sweater for a shower, and it was very quick! I modified the buttons to have them run up the raglan seam.
http://www.spunkyhats.com/boogie_lilsis.htm

the kitchener bitch said...

oof. I could've used those cards on more than one occasion. If it's any consolation to you, I've known a couple babies who started out that way, and still grew up to be thoughtful, intelligent, sensitive beings that weren't so fucked up after all. Sometimes we perservere despite our gene pool being a bit of a cess-pool.

The M/D baby kimono is a good one, but you could just as easily invent your own worsted-weight sweater. yarnstandards.com has the measurements for the average baby, and you can extrapolate from there to get a good baby sweater design in about a half hour. You know, box shaped with box shaped sleeves. or you could use the raglan generator to make a pattern for you. Do you have the Encore already? If not, go for Cotton-Ease or some other cotton - just as sturdy and half as likely to pill.

ellen said...

Yes, knit a little something. All your kind thoughts for the baby will go into your knitting and maybe make a tiny difference for the little one.

Anonymous said...

How about a security blanket, the sweet child will need one. Make sure its machine washable or the kid will end up with a felted potholder.

Nancy

Kathryn said...

I wonder what Twisty would say about all this?

Who would the blamer blame??

Member of the Patriarchy, or member of the sex class?

Carol said...

Ooh, good point, Kathryn. Thanks for making it.