I decided to schlep the thing over to the computer store. As I waited my turn, in a line of equally panicked computer users, all bearing their wounded machines and a look of desperation, an 8-year-old kid sat down next to me, lugging a computer tower.
"What's wrong with your computer?" he asked me in a chirpy voice.
How cute, I thought. Keeping my explanation simple in light of his age, I said, "My computer keeps giving me this weird message when I try to start it up."
"What does it say?" How adorable, I thought. He wants to help me fix my computer and he can barely tie his shoes! (I didn't notice that his shoes closed with Velcro.)
"It says [insert computer jargon here], whatever that means."
Without missing a beat, he says, "Well, it sounds to me like you have a hard drive issue. Have you defragmented it lately? I hope you have up-to-date virus protection," he added sternly.
"Um, okay, well, I guess we'll see what the computer nerd--guys say," I said weakly.
"Do you know what kind of disk interface family your computer uses?" he inquired solicitously.
"I don't know, it's a Dell," I said, desperately looking to see if the next available customer service representative was free to help me.
"You don't know?" he said in a tone steeped with condescension. "I suppose it's a PC rather than a Mac. Why on earth people continue to buy PCs when the Mac has a superior life span on its stock system, the potential for customization is endless, any disadvantage at symmetrical or pre-emptive multitasking is far outweighed by the intuitiv--"
"Do you like SpongeBob?" was my last salvo, and thankfully I was saved by the cry of "Next!" from the customer service counter.
Although I was given all sorts of dire expectation-lowering disclaimers about their ability to fix my computer, and how long it would take (punctuated by helpful observations and suggestions from the eight-year-old
So now I'm back on-line and, thankfully, did not have to get a new hard drive or computer to achieve that. Tomorrow I SWEAR I will continue with the TNNA update, but for now, having wound about 10 skeins of this lovely laceweight:
I am whipped. (Look for a BBF update Friday-ish.)